Embracing Failure like a Long Lost Friend

Embracing Failure like a Long Lost Friend

Embracing Failure like a Long Lost Friend

You know, I’ve been having some conversations with people about failure recently. Some of these people are in groups and others on sites I’m a member of. And one thing these conversations have in common is that the subject of failure seems to be divided. I’ll show you what I mean:

Which Statement about Failure do you Relate to:

  • On the one hand failure is something we were taught when we were younger; that if you failed it wasn’t a good thing. Nobody had to necessarily say that, we all felt the pain of failure. There was an unexpected ending of something and great loss or disappointment followed. Pain was associated with failure, whether it was failing an exam or even a sports tryout. When we failed we felt pain. Therefore we avoided it.
  • On the other hand, I’ve been listening to some amazing entrepreneurs like Jeff Walker, Tony Robbins, Dean Graziosi, Susan Garrett and quite a few others that see failure differently. They wear their failure like a badge of honor. Their belief is that if you haven’t failed then you haven’t grown.

Now I know this isn’t strictly true, because of course you can grow in life and in business in so many ways without calling it a failure, and they’re all worthwhile. But what if for a moment we took that perspective? That failure was something to be proud of. It meant we’d tried, we’re growing and moving forward.

Defining Failure is Important

Now it seems to me that these mega-successful entrepreneurs have come to successfully divide failing from becoming a failure. Which makes absolute sense because it’s only temporary. When you have a broken arm, you temporarily are incapacitated but you aren’t identified as a broken-armed person are you? You don’t see yourself that way and neither do others. Yet, when we fail, we often refer to ourselves as failures. So the differentiation between failing and failure is an important one.

When you know that temporary failures are a part of life, you can begin to incorporate them a little more into your life and your language. (Some people I’ve met won’t even use the term failure because they see it as too negative.) These experiences are helping you move forward. You didn’t give up walking because you kept falling down when you were a baby and neither should you give up on your dreams. Ever!

Failure Is a Fast Track to Success

Failure is just a word. It’s not a term or an infliction. It’s not a disease and nor is it contagious. Failure is a fast-track to success. It seems the more you fail, the bigger your success. Of course your family won’t understand this. But the reason people seem to have enormous success following periods of failure is that their success is proportionate. Failure has given them the knowledge and the tools to move in directions they couldn’t even see before.

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It opens their eyes to different opportunities, doors that once appeared closed and that’s what we call growth. Growth is inevitable and once you make peace with failure, you no longer fear it.

I now no longer mind using the word, because it’s worn with pride. I know that every failure or disappointment is bringing me closer to success. In fact, I don’t know one successful person who hasn’t experienced failure along the way, many times of all different sizes.

Embracing Failure is Freeing

You see, if you’ve failed it means you’ve made decisions. You’ve made choices and have experienced consequences. All the things you did when you were younger. The difference is that now you know that instead of it being because you were wrong, it’s because you wanted to experience life. Rather than debilitating, it’s in fact freeing.

I now no longer have pressure to get it right and I don’t have to choose ‘the best’ decision. I make a decision and then it leads me to the next and the next. And just like learning to ride a bicycle; I fall – sometimes. Do my decisions work – maybe. Do I achieve what I want, eventually. And do I get back up – absolutely.

Making peace with failure is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made and I challenge you to quickstart your success by doing the same. Give failure a big hug like a long lost friend and welcome it into your life with open arms. You’ll love the experience.

gayle maree

 

6D Mood Mastery Quickstart

Your inner path to consistent happiness.

If you haven't taken advantage of the 14 day  Mood Mastery Quickstart then it's your time to begin now. Take back control of your life and begin to create your habit of happiness.

This quickstart includes the PDF to your inner guidance, Mood Barometer and your Mood Map.

Continue your journey with

6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook

6 dimensions of healing

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About Gayle Maree

Gayle overcame decades of limiting beliefs about success and money to live a life she had only dreamt about. She spends her time between USA and Australia (home to their 7 grown children and Natural Health Clinic) and conducts workshops all over the world with husband of 30 years, Allan; helping purpose-driven women like you, shed their old patterns and beliefs to manifest the happiness they truly deserve.

People are attracted to Gayle for the high energy, intuitive insights and deep wisdom; and for the powerful transformation they gain through 6D Mood Mastery.

Are you ready to transform your life?

Her key course is 6D Mood Mastery©, and 6 Foundations for a Successful Online Business©.

Gayle is a Spiritual Counselor, Mother, Entrepreneur and Eternal Optimist. She is co-author of 6 Dimensions of Healing©, author of 6 Foundations of a Successful Online Business©  and Habits of Happiness.

Her mission is to empower people to recognize their own inner guidance so they can take the path of happiness to manifest their dreams.

Role Model versus Anti-Role Model

Role Model versus Anti-Role Model

Recently I was asked to write about something my parents taught me. I thought about that for a while and decided that they taught me they weren’t my best advocates. They weren’t my biggest fans. If I had an idea or opportunity, they weren’t the ones to cheer me on. It seems they weren’t a positive role model.

Role Model and Anti-Role Model

Now this may sound quite negative, but actually this is how all opportunities for growth begin.  We have role models and we have what I call anti-role models. The difference between the two is that a role model inspires you to be like them and an anti-role model deters you from being like them. Both are crucial to your development.

We see Role Models in our society as being pivotal to our success. They are the ones that lift us from mediocrity by inspiring something better that stirs within. However, inspiration comes when you are in a mood that is close enough to reach it. So, if you are feeling angry, discouraged or even overwhelmed (check out the Mood Map), you are not likely to be in the vicinity of inspiration.

However, when you feel this way, you are very aligned with an Anti-Role Model. Someone who will bring you back down to Earth with a thud by reminding you of your shortcomings. It’s the ones we are closest to that become the instigators for change. These are the people we have grown up with. We have a level of respect for them, whether a parent or a boss, a friend or work colleague. When they demean or diminish you, they are your anti-role models. They bring emphasis to something that needs changing.

Discern Who Shares Your Dreams

For instance, someone not believing in your dreams or your abilities. It did take many years of feeling sorry for myself to get over this unfortunately, but everything happens in it’s own time. Eventually I decided that I needed to believe in myself. It was a scary proposition because there was nobody to catch me when I fell.  No one to blame if it didn’t work out and nobody to talk it over with. But that wasn’t the end, it was only a stepping stone. It helped me look for strength and support. Not support from others but an inner connection. I found that when I felt good I was strong and felt supported. I began to discern who I could tell my ideas and share my dreams with and who I shouldn’t.

You see, dreams and ideas are fragile. They are in their infancy and need to be nurtured. It’s our job to protect them and give them the nourishment they need. In this case, their food is encouragement, excitement, enthusiasm, refinement. Share them only with people who will help nurture them. Keep them safe within until they are at a stage where they can no longer be contained. By then, they will be teenagers and want to test their environment. These dreams have been well fed and have now developed to a stage of believing in themselves. They still aren’t ready to take on the world but they are rapidly growing in strength. Let them grow.

It’s at this time your carefully nurtured dreams begin to develop momentum. As others are interested in what they’re about, more come and join their path. Likeminded people who help grow their journey.

Soon, the idea that was but an embryo is a full entity of its own.

Can One Person be both Role Model and Anti-Role Model

Mine all began with parents who pushed me away. Had they not have done this, I may still be looking for their approval. I might still be asking their permission and I may never have believed in myself. If that had happened, this idea could never have been birthed and the dream would not have become real.

Is it possible to have both role models and anti-role models in the same person? Yes it is. Because it’s often not the whole person you dislike, it’s the behavior. So a person can squash the hopes and dreams of a child (because they are afraid) and they can laugh and run and kick the ball with them, inspiring a close relationship.

How To Use Role Models

See your role models as providing patterns of behavior that you’d like to adopt. In that way, nobody has to live up to your expectations. Look for someone in your life that emulates the relationships you’d like and say to yourself “I’d like some of that”. Find someone different who parents in a way you admire and say “I’ll have some of that”. When you come across somebody who loves life, you can say “I’ll adopt some of that thank you”. In this way you are moving toward something you want, borrowing the best of humanity, rather than trying to push away something you don’t want.

You can never push against a thought hard enough for anything to leave your vibration because we live in an inclusive Universe. And that’s why clearing doesn’t work. The more attention you give something, the more you invite it in. So, by all means acknowledge your anti-role models and what you didn’t like. Gripe about what you’d rather not have picked up along the way and what you resent. Then, when you’re ready, build your bridge by using the inspiration of role models and walk over that bridge to something new and enjoyable. Imagine it, love it, immerse yourself in it and burn the bridge behind you.

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New Year and New Beginnings

New Year and New Beginnings

Did you enter the New Year of 2019 with a big bang and a pocket full of intentions? You wouldn’t be on your own. Usually people set their New Year’s resolutions as a sort of wish list formed from past guilt.

For instance; the most common New Year resolutions are to get fit, lose weight, give up smoking or drinking and visit family more often. After a month or two, you berate yourself for not having followed through and after three months, you have forgotten all about having even made them.

That’s because they weren’t something you were committed to, they were just something you felt guilty about, so thought you should do. There’s a big difference between being feeling guilty and being committed.

Choose Something You Feel Passionate About

So for this New Year, I decided to let go of the resolutions altogether and my husband and I sat down on New Years Eve and made some commitments for the coming year ahead. Not very many. Actually there were only two. But these were something we felt passionate about, we could do together and felt excited to begin.

And that’s the secret to any resolution or commitment. The journey needs to feel inspired. It’s wonderful to feel motivated about the end result but it’s the journey that takes the longest time. So if you aren’t excited about the journey, you won’t even reach the destination.

We didn’t need to write down our roles. We’ve been together for 30 years now, so we know where each other’s strengths lie and Allan’s the ideas man, I’m the researcher and organiser and we both bring in different content. I’m the one who pulls it altogether and Allan will market the result. We respect what each other brings to the table and we both have our individual visions of how we want this to unravel.

This is the most excited I’ve felt about any resolutions in the past and I don’t feel any pressure from guilt to make this happen.

What are your New Year Commitments?

Do you know what you want to achieve this year? Did your resolutions support this goal? Or is it still a dream? (The Difference between a Dream, Goal and Desire) You will know when you are ready to move forward on your goals as you will feel excited about the next step and then the next.

But please don’t take action if you aren’t inspired to do so, as the road will be bumpy and difficult. This just means that you aren’t ready yet. If this is the case for you, then spend time pondering and imagining and refining the details of this dream until you do feel inspired to take action. Inevitably, when you do, the action will be more powerful, enjoyable and worth the wait.

Welcome to a brand New Year. A year of new beginnings, fun and laughter. If that’s what you want!

Oh and remember to pick up your copy of 6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook here. It’s a new beginning to a new you.

How To Get Along With Difficult Co-Workers

How To Get Along With Difficult Co-Workers

We’ve all been there. Stuck in a situation where you have to work with someone who openly resents you. At work this can be very difficult. It doesn’t matter how nice you are to the person, they just seem to resent you more.

And it’s true. Sometimes, just your presence will annoy people.

This can be for many reasons. Some are:

  1. You’ve done something to upset them
  2. You have annoying habit patterns
  3. They resent your position
  4. You’re happy and easy to get along with
  5. You’re too positive

These reasons may seem illogical. I mean, if you are happy, then won’t everyone like you? Not necessarily. But we’ll get to the reason in a moment.

Evaluate the Reasons

  • So you may have done something to upset someone. If you are aware of that, you can apologise. If you aren’t, the method of handling this is to ask them. Get them alone, look them in the eyes and ask “You seem to be upset with me. Have I done something to upset you”? Say it sincerely and be concerned. Because you really do want to know the answer if there is one. However, in my experience, nobody answers that question. It does clear the air though and that is the purpose.
  • Do you have annoying habit patterns? What about interrupting people when they are speaking? Do you need to be heard all the time? Are you the type to back stab or climb all over people to get where you want to go? Do you exhibit the traits of a good listener or instead think about what you are going to say when others are speaking? Everybody wants to be respected and valued for their suggestions and ideas. When you interrupt a person’s suggestion, you are devaluing them as a person. If you aren’t sure whether you do this or not, ask a friend or colleague you get along with. Everything is changeable.
  • There are people who are unhappy with their lot in life and and will therefore resent what you have. They think they should have been the one in that position, and they resent you for being there. This is definitely not personal, as they would resent anybody in the same position as you. However, it doesn’t make it easy to gain a positive working relationship. If you understand this as the case, then tackle it head on. Let them know that you understand they would have liked the position and you are sorry they didn’t get it (After all, it wasn’t your decision). That will help them to trust that you are on their side. You are an ally and not the opposition.
  • People resent those who are easy to get along with. Many people will not like you, just because you are happy. This shines a spotlight on their unhappiness. They know what they need to do and yet they don’t want to make the effort to change their lives, so they resent the spotlight you have shone on their inadequacies. You can’t change how another feels about you, but you can change how you feel about them. When you understand that these insecurities are causing the personality imbalance, you can allow yourself to feel good anyway.
  • Similar to the last reason, being positive annoys the heck out of people. Unless you are in a highly positive and uplifting environment (and then you won’t be having problems with your co-workers), people are so bogged down and focused on things that make them feel bad, that your positivity is downright annoying. Rather than seeing your positivity as something that could lift them out of their doldrums and make them more creative, they resent what they see as the magnification of their shortcomings and blame you for that. To change this, feel excited and positive within, rather than trying to express yourself in words. We teach by example and your example of positivity will always win out.

Why are people Difficult?

We either bring out the best or the worst in people. It all depends on whether we are focused on the best or the worst in people. Everybody exhibits both, so it’s your choice what you want to magnify in others. It is natural that when you bring out the worst in somebody that you would then perceive them as difficult.

Some people are difficult all the time and others are difficult occasionally. This can’t be controlled by you as it has more to do with what that person is thinking and feeling. If they could control their mood, then they wouldn’t be difficult.

When you focus on ‘feeling great, no matter what’, you will cocoon yourself in a bubble of your own joy. If others try to penetrate this bubble by their insensitivity or negativity, you reset your intentions to ‘feel great no matter what’ and look for things that are working. They could be the simple things in life or they could be something you imagine.

Choose How To Handle It Better

Don’t ever argue, as it is worthless. You can never win against resentment. Keep your voice even, as they will match you. Keep your body language open. No folded arms, foot tapping or frowning. If difficult people push your buttons, then get rid of the buttons. You don’t need them.

In this way, you will be paving the way for a happy working future as you create your own reality based on your dominant mood. Choose your mood consciously and you will be choosing a better future.

If you would like to read more articles on this try:

20 Tactics for Dealing with Difficult People

and

A realistic approach to dealing with people who don’t like you.

Butterfly: A Symbol Of Transformation

Butterfly: A Symbol Of Transformation

Butterfly: A Symbol Of Transformation

butterfly symbolism

The Butterfly – A Symbol Of A Past Era

The butterfly has long been symbolic in native culture due to the transformation it undergoes from birth to maturity. There is a Native American symbolic legend of that goes,

” If you have a secret wish, capture a butterfly and whisper your wish. Your secret is ever safe in their keeping. Release the butterfly, and it will carry your wish to the Great Spirit, who alone knows the thoughts of butterflies. By setting the butterfly free, you are helping to restore the balance of nature, and your wish will surely be granted.”

Butterflies are a symbol of change, joy, and the changing colors of life.  Their fluttering dance is a reminder not to take life too seriously. They are both delicate and vulnerable, yet have a sense of lightness, joy and freedom.

They’re reminders to keep moving forward in spirit, mind and body, for if you can move you can dance, and dance brings joy, which leads to the dance of freedom of life.

Butterfly Symbolism

The butterfly is a powerful symbol for transformation. It begins life in one form and then goes through a period of dormancy, where it transforms to leave the safety of the cocoon in its new form.

An excellent analogy for anyone starting afresh in life as new choices create a new beginning. It doesn’t matter where you’ve come from or where you’re standing now, there comes a period of seeming dormancy where growth makes way for transformation. This is your new beginning. So when in the midst of change or chaos, remembering the freedom and carefree nature of a butterfly can help you find clarity.

A butterfly is a strong symbol of metamorphosis, with distinct stages. It can remind you to make changes when the opportunity arises. Change and transformation are inevitable for us all, as change is a very natural part of life, its a progression that happens constantly to all of us and doesn’t need to be traumatic. And just like the butterfly, change is not only happening all around us, it’s happening within, constantly.

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Spirits And Souls

Butterfly symbolism is also closely tied to the idea of spirits and souls. It has been used in many religions and cultures throughout the centuries of Western Europe.

In fact, Psyche is the Greek word for both soul and butterfly. There was a belief that butterflies were human souls searching for a new incarnation, which gave the creature uncanny and sometimes ominous connotations. This symbolism was also used in early Christianity as a symbol of the soul. Celts thought that women became pregnant by swallowing butterfly souls. These butterfly-souls flew about seeking a new mother. (Beautiful and also a little scary no doubt)

Other cultures believed that spirits of the dead took the form of white butterflies. In northern Europe to see an ethereal white butterfly flying at night was a warning of death, and others believed that the soul-butterfly’s ability to leave the body in sleep, accounts for your dreams.

Today’s Symbol of the Butterfly

These may have been past cultures and religions, but even today there is a mystery and modern symbolism surrounding the butterfly. I know many who attribute butterflies on their shoulder or flitting around them as a sign their passed loved one is making a connection. It is a much more gentle form of an older butterfly symbolism.

The most significant for us as humans, of all the transformational signs, is the ability of the butterfly to live totally in the present. Imagine the freedom of a life without regrets, sadness, hostility, revenge, memories or resentments of past grievances or holding on to past hurts. Imagine living in the present in harmony with your surroundings and the complete joy and lightness of freedom.

So next time you see a butterfly, ponder its flight and enjoy the symbolism of freedom it offers. Like the butterfly, 6 Dimensions of Healing also offers you the freedom of transformation in your own life.

gayle maree

The Gentle Path of Transformation begins with 6D Mood Mastery Quickstart.  It’s an easy path to self-worth, it’s totally free and instills confidence and clarity for your journey ahead.

6D Mood Mastery Quickstart

Your inner path to consistent happiness.

If you haven't taken advantage of the 14 day  Mood Mastery Quickstart then it's your time to begin now. Take back control of your life and begin to create your habit of happiness.

This quickstart includes the PDF to your inner guidance, Mood Barometer and your Mood Map.

Continue your journey with

6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook

6 dimensions of healing

Amazon Au    Barnes & Noble    Amazon US

About Gayle Maree

Gayle overcame decades of limiting beliefs about success and money to live a life she had only dreamt about. She spends her time between USA and Australia (home to their 7 grown children and Natural Health Clinic) and conducts workshops all over the world with husband of 30 years, Allan; helping purpose-driven women like you, shed their old patterns and beliefs to manifest the happiness they truly deserve.

People are attracted to Gayle for the high energy, intuitive insights and deep wisdom; and for the powerful transformation they gain through 6D Mood Mastery.

Are you ready to transform your life?

Her key course is 6D Mood Mastery©, and 6 Foundations for a Successful Online Business©.

Gayle is a Spiritual Counselor, Mother, Entrepreneur and Eternal Optimist. She is co-author of 6 Dimensions of Healing©, author of 6 Foundations of a Successful Online Business©  and Habits of Happiness.

Her mission is to empower people to recognize their own inner guidance so they can take the path of happiness to manifest their dreams.