7 Ways to Build Self-Confidence Quickly
Confidence is actually an ambiguous subject. There is general confidence which means to have a sense of trust in your ability to control your life and then there’s confidence in a particular subject or area of life. And both of these are about self-confidence.
Did you realize that it’s possible to be confident in some areas of life and not others? This means that people who seem confident aren’t necessarily confident in everything they do, they actually borrow confidence from one area of their lives and bring it into another, just as if they’re borrowing sugar from a neighbor.
Why is self-confidence so important?
Self-confidence is not an emotion but it’s connected to many emotions. When you lack self-confidence, you’re quiet, in need of support and look for validation. This means it can be difficult to make somebody who is low in self-confidence feel happy as they don’t feel they deserve to feel good. So, low confidence equates to insecurity.
When you’re confident, you even hold your posture differently. Your head is held high, shoulders back and you take in the world as if it’s yours to be claimed. There is an air about confident people that others are attracted to. Because everybody loves to hang around confident people, just in case it rubs off on them too. You may not always agree with confident people, but you certainly admire their energy.
Self-confidence is also important for manifesting what you want in life. Because when you are insecure you have split energy and therefore find it difficult to focus on what you want without doubt creeping in. But confident people focus and move in the direction of their desire and the Universe fills in the manifestation as the next obvious step.
Cockiness is Different to Self-Confidence
Now, we’re not talking about cockiness here. As that pretends confidence. It’s insecurity dressed in confident clothing and while everyone is attracted to confident people, nobody likes a cocky person, a showoff, a know-it-all, somebody who’s full of themselves. That’s not what I mean by confidence. Confidence and cockiness are at different ends of the vibrational scale or mood map.
Confidence Helps you Become More Successful
Because confidence is believing in yourself and your ability, it can help you become more successful.
In fact, confidence is a paradox. Because to gain confidence you need to take action and be moving forward, but if you don’t feel confident, you don’t have the motivation to move forward and gain confidence in the first place. So confident people become more confident when they’re moving towards a goal and insecure people become less confident when they’re not.
Confidence Transfers Across Your Life
If you were good at something when you were younger then you can borrow that self-confidence from that area of your life and bring it into a new area or project. For instance, if you were good at sports, then you can adopt the same attitude in business. That’s why, when you are confident in one area of life, you are likely to be more confident and successful in another project that you begin.
Confidence also gains momentum. So if you can muster the motivation to begin a project or goal, then just the movement forward will help you gain energy, confidence and momentum to keep going. So, the better it gets, the better it gets.
Here are 7 ways to instantly gain more self-confidence.
1. Stop comparing yourself to others
The only person you can compare yourself to is who you were last week. Comparison will kill self-confidence every time. You’re not supposed to be like others, you don’t live their lives, experience their challenges or know their dreams. Social media makes people’s lives seem enviable when in fact, everybody has their demons. So just strive to become a better version of yourself than you were last week, last month or last year.
2. Don’t strive for perfection
Tony Robbins says that perfection is the lowest rung you can aim for as you’re always going to miss. Nobody is perfect and nothing you do will ever be perfect. And that’s ok. Progress is always better than perfection. Moving forward is better than being afraid to fail and accepting yourself just as you are will help you feel more self-confident.
3. Surround yourself with Positive people
Sometimes this is easier said than done. But often you have a choice about who you hang around with. Just think about how your friends make you feel. Do they judge and constantly bring you down? Do they talk about others in a judgmental way? Or are they uplifting and supportive, with goals of their own that keep them confident? You may not always have a choice of who to be with but when you do, make a choice that supports your self-confidence.
4. Take care of your body
It’s difficult to feel good about yourself if you’re abusing your body, so feed it nourishing foods, give it exercise and the sleep it needs. Your body doesn’t necessarily trust you to take care of it, so show it that you care and it won’t keep giving you those thoughts that keep you feeling low and insecure. Thoughts like, this don’t feel right. Or we’ll start this routine tomorrow.
This is the one practice that will keep your confidence growing. Meditation gets the thoughts out of the way and allows your body to balance and your mind to chill. It helps you to connect to your soul’s path by bypassing the mind and engaging the heart. Therefore connecting with the path of your Soul’s Blueprint. And it’s the consistency of the meditation that’s important as you’re setting up a habit pattern that will serve you.
6. Be Kind to Yourself
We all get disappointed about things in life. But it’s never what happens, it’s how you handle what happens. You always have the choice of whether to berate yourself or forgive yourself. And the most important part of this is your self-talk. How you talk to yourself makes a huge difference in your self-confidence. Just imagine, if you can be your own cheerleader and talk yourself into being better and better, convincing yourself that every mistake you make is just practice for being better than you were last week.
7. Challenge your Fears
Many fears form beliefs and these beliefs aren’t often true. For instance, when I was young I was told that strange men were dangerous, so it was a long time even as an adult before I would get into a taxi. There are many fears you have that aren’t valid, don’t support you and just aren’t true, so it’s time to question them. Challenge them and then decide to take the next step forward. Don’t let these old, debilitating beliefs hold you back, they aren’t based in truth. Find out the beliefs that hold you back here.
Click to download the Confidence Chart.
Protect Your Confidence
At all costs. Your confidence is important so don’t let others’ opinions erode it. You are better off finding groups of like-minded people online than hanging around with those that don’t support you. Think of your self-confidence as a precious jewel. You want to look after it and keep it safe and you’ll make sure it is well protected.
Your Secret Weapon for Self-confidence
But your secret weapon for self-confidence is simple, easy and it’s free. It’s a smile. Remember the song, when you’re smiling the whole world smiles with you? Well, smiling creates a feedback loop. And it works like this. Find something that you like, that makes your soul sing (it could be a memory of the past, your kids, or grandchildren, a furry friend), something that makes you light up and then go shopping.
Because of that inward smile, whenever you look at somebody they’ll smile back at you and you’ll smile, then you’ll catch somebody else’s eye and they’ll smile at you. It’s called a smiling feedback loop and it boosts your self-confidence. And you can do this anywhere at anytime. That’s why it’s your secret weapon.
Self-Confidence is it’s Own Reward
Imagine feeling good about the decisions you make. That means no remorse, no sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, and no beating yourself up.
Just that feeling of joy and excitement that wells up inside your body like butterflies fluttering and dancing when you’ve made a decision you’re happy with, and a REAL smile on your face.
Become confident by shifting a limiting belief. Confidence can’t be purchased but it can be adopted. It’s a learned behavior and you can begin right now. CLICK HERE.
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Who am I?
I’m Gayle Maree, creator of 6 Dimensions of Healing, author, mother, Past Life Therapist and Spiritual Counselor for over 23 years.
Someone once told me (a well-respected mentor) that people need “experts” to live a life they value… and I didn’t believe them.
I thought everybody could do it on their own because I did. I figured out what didn’t work in my life and then I changed it. Actually, I changed me. And it was a LOT of work!
Not because I was trying to impress those that told me I had a ‘bad attitude’ or I had something to prove to people who thought I was lousy at pretty well everything, but because there were aspects of me that even I didn’t like. I wanted improvements in me and my life.
Change Versus Comfort
It was obvious to me that if I didn’t make changes I could expect more of the same in my life as before. The same things that didn’t work, the same relationships that my parents had.
I wanted more. Mostly, I wanted my kids to be proud of me. Damn it, I wanted to be proud of myself.
So, I set about what would be a continuous, amazing journey.
I’ve been with my Spiritual Soulmate over 30 years now and we still work on the relationship, we work on improving us, because we know that whatever we want, to get it we need to be different to how we were.
And I listen so much more now because I value the wisdom of my non-physical guides who have been with me for as long as I can remember.
Now it’s your turn
This is the same path I used to make the changes that led to a valued and prosperous life. So much more than I ever imagined.
The path is laid out in our book 6 Dimensions of Healing