10 Ways to Reflect that’ll Supercharge your New Year
Why you should reflect on the past…
This isn’t a therapy thing. I don’t want you to commiserate about the past. As a therapist, the only time I reflect on the past is for an acknowledgment or a realization, or both. And that’s what’s happening here.
Normally I would say plan ahead, look towards the future and move in the direction of the things you want in life. None of that even remotely hints at looking into the past.
But there is a time to reflect on what’s gone by and the end of the year is one time that it’s actually advantageous. Not because of regret or hard times or even to commiserate on a time or opportunities passed by, but to use it as a platform for something bigger and better in the coming New Year.
To Reflect or not to Reflect
Now reflecting is not the same as pondering or beating yourself up or being disappointed. To reflect is to gain the nuggets of what has already happened, to you, for you or because of you, and use it as a springboard for what’s to come.
It’ll supercharge your growth and it’s the secret to expansion.
Having said this, here are 10 things to reflect on to give you that jet fuel blast into the new year. (You might like to write the answers down.) I’ve shared my answers with you. You see, I’m human too.
1. What gave you the most joy this year? What made your heart sing?
I know for me, what gave me a lot of joy was spending time with my 3-year-old granddaughter and looking at life through her eyes. We were exploring the fruit trees in her new back yard and her sense of wonder was inspiring with every moth and butterfly, baby fruit and even the well. It helped me to realize how much I loved that childlike joy. I’ve heard it said that you should see the world every day through the eyes of a child so that you can learn to love life. I agree wholeheartedly.
2. What made you Unhappy this year?
Not being able to travel. I love exploring the world with my husband, doing face to face workshops and meeting amazing people. This year I had to settle for being at home and zooming. It was a poor substitute.
3. What was your Biggest Realization this year?
My BIGGEST realization (I won’t call it a lesson) was how important it’s been for me to look for what’s working. I had practiced that positive mindset until it was second nature and only realized how MUCH I loved it when I was asked to critique something. That criticism started to eat away at my positive mindset and I realized how much I LOOOVED feeling great. And I only feel great when I look for what’s working. (This all stemmed from my New Year’s resolution. Will talk about that later.)
4. What do you wish you Had Have Done more of?
Not what you ‘could’ have done, but what you know would have been good for you but you DIDN’T do as much of it as you would have liked?
So, apart from travel which was out of my control, what I would have liked to have done more of is to be more focused in my business. I was there but not as committed as I wanted to be and I feel disappointed about that.
5. What’s something you’d like to Give Up next year?
I’m going to be honest with you here. I would really like to give up procrastination habits to become more focused and excited about my future. After all, I’m the creator of my reality and if I don’t get excited about it, then nobody else will.
6. What were you Most Proud Of this year?
I was very proud of bringing together so many amazing people for a 10 day Virtual Mind Body Spirit Festival this year. It worked and I loved it.
7. What was something you Failed At this year?
We found this a really difficult question when it was thrown around the table. Maybe because nobody likes to think of themselves and failure in the same sentence. Disappointments maybe, but failure is a strong word. However, because I hadn’t actually FAILED at anything I really think that maybe my plans weren’t big enough. I wasn’t committed enough. Because I know if I’m not failing then I’m not extending enough. So maybe I failed to make BIG plans.
8. What is something you’d like to Change for next year?
We all know that if you do the same things over and over again you get the same results. And that’s a good thing if you want the same results. I’d like something more next year so I’ve decided to plan more. To make bigger plans and go for bigger things, not just that which I think is achievable.
I’m remembering the saying that if you fail to plan then you plan to fail. I know it’s corny but it certainly has an element of truth.
9. What’s something you want to Get Rid Of next year?
There’s giving up and there’s getting rid of. ‘Giving up’ is about things you feel you have control over, like cigarettes or alcohol. ‘Getting rid of’, is something you feel you don’t have as much control over. Such as anxiety, toxic people or other habits that don’t serve you but have been lingering for a very long time.
I’m still working on last year’s commitment, but I think I’ll add disappointment to the list. I’ll get rid of the habit of being disappointed about anything or anyone. It begins with expectations and there’s a whole lot more with that which ends up in me not believing in myself. So I’ll get rid of the habit of disappointment. It’s a tiny thorn that gets under your skin and festers. I don’t want that anymore.
10. What’s your Commitment for the New Year?
Resolution, commitment, whatever you’d like to call it. But make it something that’s important to you. For me, this New Year’s commitment was about not being critical. I wanted to look for things that were working and leave the criticism to others. Because it’s been a challenging year with Covid and all the social divisions that have occurred, it’s been a challenge not to pass out criticism or enter into the witch hunt and I haven’t always gotten there, but I’m closer. And I feel happy with where I’m at.
So what’s your commitment to yourself for next year? If you’ve written the answers down like I have, you’ll be able to get a pretty clear picture on where to go next. So here goes:
In 2022, my commitment to me is to make bigger plans, more often, look forward to them working and not be disappointed when they don’t.
Should you make a resolution for this New Year?
I see it as a commitment I make to myself and use it to improve something that’s been stuck for awhile. Or a habit that doesn’t serve me that I want to change. And yes, you can do this anytime of the year. But I have found that these commitments made for the first day of a New Year can weave their way through every decision you make throughout the entire year.
It’s almost as if you are creating a track for the next year to run along. And I want to be in control of that.
So, if you decide to make a commitment or resolution, I’ve found that these guidelines will help make it stick.
Rules for resolutions:
- Make it something that you REALLY want to change. Have some skin in the game. Understand why it’s important, what it’s going to be like when you do and also how your life will be if you don’t.
- Remind yourself throughout the year and realign with it. Don’t just leave it to the first day of the year. Remind yourself at different times to get your carriage back on the track. Sometimes it will wander far and wide. That’s normal.
- Only make one. Stick to just one commitment. One that’s important is more likely to stick than several. Choose one and keep moving forward.
Whether you make resolutions or not, don’t underestimate the power of a brand New Year. It’s a year that has never existed in history before. Each day is an opportunity to begin the day afresh with a new mood and a fresh perspective, but a New Year allows us to wipe the momentum of the past year and begin afresh. A do-over if you like. Even if you made a mess of things last year, this is an opportunity to do things differently.
Reflect and Clarify
It’s not just a number, it’s science. Numbers in a new year are different to any year in history. The numerology in the year offers us new opportunities throughout every part of the year. And there is no end to the opportunities available just as there is no end to the years that come, one after the other.
So use the questions above to sit down either by yourself or with others to reflect on where you are now and clarify what you want for the future. This is your opportunity to supercharge your new year with the seeds of a really great life and it begins now.
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Who am I?
I’m Gayle Maree, creator of 6 Dimensions of Healing, author, mother of 7 and Spiritual Counselor for over 23 years.
Someone once told me (a well-respected mentor) that people need “experts” to live a life they value… and I didn’t believe them.
I thought everybody could do it on their own because I did. I figured out what didn’t work in my life and then I changed it. Actually, I changed me. And it was a LOT of work!
Not because I was trying to impress those that told me I had a ‘bad attitude’ or I had something to prove to people who thought I was lousy at pretty well everything, but because there were aspects of me that even I didn’t like. I wanted improvements in me and my life.
Change Versus Comfort
It was obvious to me that if I didn’t make changes I could expect more of the same in my life as before. The same things that didn’t work, the same relationships that my parents had.
I wanted more. Mostly, I wanted my kids to be proud of me. Damn it, I wanted to be proud of myself.
So, I set about what would be a continuous, amazing journey.
I’ve been with my Spiritual Soulmate over 30 years now and we still work on the relationship, we work on improving us, because we know that whatever we want, to get it we need to be different to how we were.
And I listen so much more now because I value the wisdom of my non-physical guides who have been with me for as long as I can remember.
Now it’s your turn
This is the same path I used to make the changes that led to a valued and prosperous life. So much more than I ever imagined.
The path is laid out in our book 6 Dimensions of Healing