People have both times of feeling positive and negative. It’s a part of being human. There are periods when even the most positive people get on a downward spiral to a place of negativity that nobody wants to go. And it is a lonely place to be.
A spiral of negativity develops when you gain momentum in looking for things that aren’t working. It happens to everyone at times. You weren’t born this way, even if it happens often. Instead you developed the pattern. If it happens more often than you would like then the pattern was probably from someone who tends to think that way as well. Our parents are our earliest influences.
A pattern begins with a thought and the thought comes simply from noticing something that doesn’t feel good and then pondering the thought. It doesn’t even need to be for long and you will attract more thoughts that feel similar. Then another and another.
These thoughts create a pattern that becomes well established so that you have a pretty good momentum going. The only way you can change this is by developing a new pattern. You will never completely rid the pattern of negativity, but you will diminish the momentum and the pattern will become dormant. Until next time you notice something that creates thoughts that don’t feel good.
- Firstly take notice of your thoughts. You will notice the content of what you are thinking by the frown or smile on your face.
- When you notice you are thinking negative thoughts, interrupt the pattern. Say something in your mind to interrupt it.
- Then choose something simple to focus on. It could be a scene in nature, a meal you enjoyed or a song you love. Anything.
- Slowly move yourself up the mood map towards thoughts that give you relief. The closer you are to joy and appreciation, the better you will feel. The further the thoughts are away from joy, the worse you will feel.
- Practice moving your thoughts to a better feeling mood until you have established some momentum. You will get to know this by whether you are frowning or smiling.
- Set your intentions each day and choose to look for things that are working.
Choose Your Thoughts
There will always be things to feel good about and things not to feel good about. You get to choose what you look at. That’s the freedom you really have. The freedom to choose your thoughts. To help with changing the pattern:
- Don’t read the newspaper
- Don’t watch the news on TV
- Don’t look for conspiracy theories
You can always find evidence of what you are looking for, no matter what that is, so be discerning with the information you feed yourself.
- Look for stories that inspire you,
- programs on TV that are funny and
- read plenty of biographies.
It takes 21 days to establish a new pattern, but this one will change your life again and again and again.
So go for it!
Gayle Maree is Life Engineer, Counselor, Mother, Entrepreneur and Eternal Optimist.
She runs a healing centre Stewart Natural Health, in Australia with her husband and Natural Therapist Allan Herring and has over 20 years of Personal Development Coaching behind her.
Gayle is Director and creator of 6 Dimensions of Healing, and designs bridges for people to build to get themselves from where they are now to where they want to be. Her book 6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook is available now.