Healing is a very intimate experience. It is extremely personal and different for everyone. When describing the act of healing, it is usually determined by how you are feeling this moment. For instance, if you have a body that is in pain, healing would be having a lessened or pain-free experience. If you are in an abusive relationship, healing would be determined by a feeling of safety which isn’t present at the moment. To be in a state of healing, means that you are moving in a direction you are happy with.
So it really depends on where you are standing today, as to what healing means to you.
Balance of Body, Mind and Spirit
Essentially though, healing means a balance of body, mind and spirit. When your body is in balance it is pain-free, supple and moves freely. When your mind is in balance, it feels clear and free, and when you have a balanced outlook on life, your spirit feels free.
The most important step on the journey to healing is understanding Relief.
When you are in a place of not wanting what you have, for whatever reason, and it is really uncomfortable, the first step on the path of healing is relief. Relief is always your turning point in the direction you want to go.
A feeling of Relief comes when any situation feels a little better than it did previously. That statement may seem broad but you’ll come to understand the feeling of Relief in your own life and recognize the feeling that accompanies it, under many circumstances.
For instance, if you are afraid walking home in the dark, a sense of Relief can come if a crowd walks with you or you get to a place of safety, or maybe someone you know gives you a ride. The circumstances are many and varied but the situation is what usually changes to create a sense of relief. Fear is not a place where you want to dwell for long, so relief is a stepping stone from fear towards balance.
Relief is Your Measure
Relief is also the savior of undermining your healing. When you are on the path to feeling better, it is easy to look at how far you have to go and feel discouraged. This is undermining your journey and will delay and progress that was imminent. It’s like throwing cold water on a fire and expecting it to roar. The momentum has been dampened. We all want change for the better.
The catch in wanting a situation to change, be it fear of walking home in the dark, a sore toe, debilitating illness or even a toxic relationship, is that you are wanting external sources to move so that you can feel better. You want others to change so that your life can get better. You want the situation to change so that your life can move forward.
You Can’t Change Other People
Well, the great news, depending on how you look at it, is that you can’t change anyone or anything. The only thing you ever have control over, is how you feel. That’s really empowering news for 3 reasons.
- People tend to be fickle. They change their minds, they don’t respond in predictable ways. They are really difficult to try and consistently control.
- You only need to change how you feel, to instigate healing. Just a feeling of relief will turn you in the direction of balance.
- You only need you. Nobody needs to help you do this. It doesn’t matter if that toxic person at the office doesn’t change or your big toe still hurts, you have the choice of looking for things that feel better. That creates relief. Which instigates a healing response in your body, naturally.
Dr Wayne Dyer put it beautifully when he wrote: You’ll See It When You Believe It.
Not the other way around. For healing to occur, it’s never the situation that needs to change first, it’s the mindset. Sometimes they even happen together as the situation is waiting to change, it’s the mindset that is the hold up. When you can change your focus from broken to whole, then your body and your life will also move in that direction.
Beliefs That Are Supportive
You were born a balanced human being and, for most people, you were born healthy. It’s the beliefs you adopted when young that keep your prisoner in a life or body you are unhappy with. To shed the beliefs, you need to cease the debilitating self talk from your repertoire that holds you from this natural healing balance. How do you know whether your beliefs are paralysing or supportive? Take notice of your mood. When you think a thought, does it make you feel good or not? If you aren’t sure which, are you smiling or frowning? If you are frowning, the thought doesn’t support healing, it doesn’t support balance and it certainly doesn’t support you.
To begin right change for the better right now, you can look for Relief. Choose a thought that is neutral. Something about the grass or the weather that you don’t really have much of an opinion on. You can begin to feel a calmness. Some space in the chaos of thought. Then look for something you like a little. Your dog playing, a kitten, playing ball with the kids etc and you will begin to feel a little better. Keep looking for thoughts that feel better and better and you will soon be feeling in a much better mood. And it does get easier, that’s because, the more you feel better, the more thoughts similar to those are attracted.
Practice Looking For Things To Feel Good About
In any situation, in any pattern of self talk, in any conversation, look for a thought that will give you a feeling of Relief. Over and over again. It’s worth practicing as the more you do, the easier it gets and the more effective it becomes.
For any healing to occur, you need to choose different thoughts to create a new pattern. A different thought, a different opinion, a new perspective. That’s the path to new information, opportunities and a really great life. It’s not difficult, it just takes awareness, so give it a go!
When you change your mood, you create a new reality.
Get your copy of 6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook here
Gayle Maree is Life Engineer, Counselor, Mother, Entrepreneur and Eternal Optimist.
She runs a healing centre Stewart Natural Health, in Australia with her husband and Natural Therapist Allan Herring and has over 20 years of Personal Development Coaching behind her.
Gayle is Director and creator of 6 Dimensions of Healing, and designs bridges for people to build to get themselves from where they are now to where they want to be. Her book 6 Dimensions of Healing – Handbook is available now.